Woke up. Did regular everyday morning stuff: got out of bed. Stumbled around. Showered. Dressed self. Dressed children. Made breakfast. Drank coffee. Packed lunch. Got kids ready to go.
Dropped Julia off at school, ran errands with Oliver. Came home, doled out a snack for the boy and turned my attention to the fucking piles of moderate amount of laundry waiting for me in the basement.
Started a load. Did regular around-the-house stuff: made beds. Tidied bedrooms. Played cars with Oliver. Put together a dress-up chest for the kids. Etcetera.
Went downstairs to switch laundry. Realized that at some point during load, laundry tub had clogged. Water! Everywhere! Realized all the dirty laundry sitting in baskets on the floor waiting patiently to be washed was wet, too!
Whee!
Started throwing towels on floor. Got mop, started mopping floor. Squished around on carpet moving furniture. Taught Oliver new swear words.
Started a new load of soaking wet towels. Mopped. Sopped. Cursed under my breath. Mopped. Sopped. Cursed. Etcetera.
Discovered that while I was mopping, sopping and cursing, Oliver had made a huge mess on the other side of basement: CD’s, books and paper everywhere. Colouring book pages torn. Crayons broken.
Briefly lost mind.
Got very mad. Decided it was a good time to put the little stinker to bed. Went back to basement to clean up mess and switch laundry. Realized the water had seeped over to the other side of the basement and that there was much more of it than I had originally thought. Took note of power bars and other electronic wiring sitting in water.
Called Dave. Became mildly annoyed when, once I explained the disaster in the basement, he started talking very slowly to me as though I were three years old and incapable of understanding the concept of calling our neighbour to borrow their shop vac. Became even more annoyed when he said stuff like, “You’re not saying anything. Hello? Hello? DOOO YOOOOU HEEEAR MEEE?”
Yelled at him to stop talking to me like an idiot. Hung up.
Called neighbour. Borrowed shop vac. Moved more furniture. Got down on all fours on the basement floor and sucked up water. Lots of water. Lots and lots of water.
Realized after a while that parts of the carpet would have to go. Got exacto knife, cut pieces of carpet out. Hauled sopping wet carpet to garage. Got putty knife, scraped foam underlay off concrete floor. Sucked up bits of foam underlay with shop vac. Swept up bits of foam underlay with broom. Was very wet and very dirty.
Cracked head so hard on corner of fuse box, stars were seen. Did the hysterical laugh/cry thing for a few minutes.
Got back to it: mopped. Sopped. Sucked up water. Swore. Swept. Mopped. Moved furniture. Swore.
Had enough time to return shop vac, start another load of laundry and heat up a slice of pizza before waking Oliver up. Put him on the potty and brought him downstairs only to have him immediately pee all over the couch.
Put him on the potty, cleaned him up, changed him. Flipped couch cushion. Went pee. Oh look, there’s Aunt Blood. Lovely.
Picked up Julia. Came home. Phone call from Dave, who was at the doctor’s: he’s likely got a mild case of bronchitis.
This is why I'm breaking up with you, Thursday. It’s over. Finito. Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out, ya fucker.
45 Comments, Comment or Ping
So glad you made it to the other side of that day, because it was definitely a doozy. I’m hoping Friday treats you much better!
February 22nd, 2008
tell the fuse box next time that happens it gets the hose again
February 22nd, 2008
Whoa. For a bit, I wasn’t sure you were going to make it. I would’ve curled up in a little ball under the covers partway through the day!
February 22nd, 2008
And then what happened? ;)
If not for the swearing, that would have made a nice story for the Old Testament.
February 22nd, 2008
You win. Your Thursday sucks more and breaking up with it is the right decision.
Also teaches you do to laundry. Just start bonfires with dirty stuff – it works for me.
February 22nd, 2008
I have done the hysterical laugh/cry many times – it is very unsettling to my DD (4 years old), but sometimes you don’t know whether to laugh or cry, so you just have to do both. My sympathies to you – I hope your new boyfriend Friday is nicer to you.
February 22nd, 2008
good god…i think i’ll boycott thursday as moral support. cause DAMN!
February 22nd, 2008
this is when i’d like you to invoke the words with mild sarcasm….”Good one, Dave! You’re a legend, Dave!”
(okay, extreme sarcasm and pissitude is alright as well)
and, just fyi, i’ll warn you that crazymumma is going to accost you with the world’s biggest hug from me very VERY shortly. just don’t let her spill wine on you. :)
February 22nd, 2008
Let’s start a movement to scrap Thursday alltogether and move straight into Friday. What a suck ass day.
February 22nd, 2008
Frankly, I’m surprised there wasn’t more swearing. I think Thursday deserves more than a break up. Unless the breaking involves Thursday’s ass as well.
February 22nd, 2008
At least you got a blog post out of it.
And a very attractive lump on your head too, by the sound of it.
February 22nd, 2008
Oh, my darlin. You definitely need to come for cocktails.
February 22nd, 2008
Oy. You need a bubble bath and copious amounts of wine. Days like that sometimes make me seriously reconsider my life choices.
February 22nd, 2008
YOU ARE BRILLIANT.
This is why you have more than 12 readers and I have … well … 12 readers and some really confused neighbors.
I would never even THINK of breaking up with an entire day. Instead I’d be outside on the front lawn with a ‘for sale’ sign and a mallet, failing miserably at getting the dang thing to stand up straight.
February 22nd, 2008
Yesterday was brutal. Fucking brutal.
I really do not care if Dave has bronchitis. He could have the plague for all I care, and I should care but all I truly care about is him getting your ass to Toronto.
I wonder if we were crying yesterday at the same time?
February 22nd, 2008
I think your relationship with Thursday was way too abusive. Good call on the break-up.
February 22nd, 2008
You tell ‘em! I bet Thurs. won’t be back around! At least for 6 more days. ;)
February 22nd, 2008
Yuh, ok so my thursday was ok, but I am not entirely on board with tuesdays.
FUCK TUESDAYS!!!
February 22nd, 2008
OH MY GOD.
You are a freakin’ superstar. You actually cut out the damaged carpet with an exacto knife? For reals?
And I thought I had a complaint this week because I bitched about Isaac’s daycare on my blog, which it turns out the daycare director READS. And you know, that shit happened yesterday. So I’m with you. Thursday is fired.
February 22nd, 2008
Wowza. “Aw, shit” is right. I’m impressed with the way you slogged through, anyway. Because in your situation, I would have just curled up in the fetal position and cried.
February 22nd, 2008
In my real world today, I’m writing the story of creation for a curriculum product. Yeah. No stress there. Took a break from that stuff and came here. Now laughing and feeling much less sorry for myself regarding task in front of me.
So….you can break up with a day of the week? Brilliant. Wednesday is so out of here for me.
Hope today is better.
February 22nd, 2008
Oh.My.God.
Seriously I hope you sucked down a couple bottles last night.
Wish I was your neighbor and I would of come and helped.
Hugs,
a.
February 22nd, 2008
man, are you productive! that is a lot of stuff to get done during Oliver’s nap.
February 22nd, 2008
Sometimes in any relationship and you have to do the right thing, even if you’ve known them “forever.” When anyone treats you that badly, they don’t deserve to be part of your life. Sounds a lot like my relationship with a certain hockey team (cough leafs cough). You did the right thing to end it. I hope Dave brought home the breakup-appropriate ice cream and red wine to console you.
February 22nd, 2008
I would have found a hole and just crawled right in. I hope Friday treated you much, much better.
February 22nd, 2008
I think when Oliver peed on the couch is when I would have started rocking back and forth and had a mental breakdown. Everything after that would have been gravy.
Good call on breaking up with Thursday. It wasn’t treating my Tulip right. You deserve nothing but the best…
Like me. Coming to TO. Soon.
February 22nd, 2008
Ugh! I hope Friday treated you nicer…
February 22nd, 2008
oy.
Chocolate.
Lots and lots of chocolate.
February 22nd, 2008
Oh yeah, fuck you thursday…holy crappers, your day was worse than mine. Aunt Bloody is such a see ya next tuesday….arghhhh.
February 22nd, 2008
FUCK.
now that’s a bad day.
ha ha.
here’s to the weekend!
Cheers!
♥
February 23rd, 2008
YUCK!
And oddly enough I was nodding at the screen… I hear ya… I so hear ya!!!!!!!
Hope it got better…
February 23rd, 2008
I broke up with yesterday.
and that last line reminds me of a woman I used to work with who would say, “Don’t let the door hit you where the good lord split you.” Cracked me up every time. At least you haven’t lost your sense of humour. Yet.
February 23rd, 2008
Please tell me that Friday was better. I understand the laugh/cry scene after the fusebox. That HAD to hurt. Why did they put the fusebox there anyway?!?! Didn’t they know better? ;)
February 23rd, 2008
That’s it Thursday. If so much as lay a finger on this lovely lady again, you’re gonna feel my pointy boot up your ass.
(Did you at least have a drink later? I would SO have gotten a drink.)
February 23rd, 2008
That was a seriously suck ass morning.
And I am exhausted from reading it.
That’s it. No more Thursdays.
February 23rd, 2008
oh man. that seriously sucks, mt.
February 24th, 2008
Hope your weekend was better!
February 24th, 2008
No shit. See ya Thursday and don’t come back.
(((((you)))))
February 24th, 2008
Good Lord that was awful. Hope Friday (and yesterday) were kinder to you.
February 24th, 2008
Holy Hell!
What a crappy thursday indeed — i’d tell her off, too!
February 24th, 2008
Thursday you frickin bite.
February 24th, 2008
Oh, fuck–we can get rid of Thursdays entirely! I feel your pain with the overflowing laundry piles and overflowing washing machine.
February 24th, 2008
Wow what a bad day!
Hope the weekend was better…..
GP x
February 25th, 2008
ouch. ouch, ouch, ouch.
February 25th, 2008
I think you won the Life in a Vortex of Frustration Award.
February 26th, 2008
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